Being a mother, wife, teacher, among other roles, leaves little time for Marthaness. I fancy myself as put together, organized, an overall “with it” gal. Drop by unannounced and you may just fall into my black hole or witness first hand my “secrets”. So I have decided to come clean, a soul cleansing of sorts. As I type, I am already feeling freed.
*Chicken “stock” usually comes from a cube.
*Fresh basil means a 6 month old tube. At least, I think it’s from last summer…
*Occasionally we have weeks where we choose our daily outfits from the folded laundry baskets. At least all are folded, right? And do I get extra points that the baskets are individually labelled?
*Often, fresh salsa is a tub from the fresh produce section. Kind of like homemade?
*My sewing “kit” is a partially rusted needle, an assortment of old buttons, and various pieces of thread that periodically accompany spare buttons.
*Fresh produce is out numbered by its frozen counterparts.
*Grass fed beef means we had hamburgers on the lawn.
*I do not own a pair of rubber gloves, let alone a pair for each cleaning caddy.
*Baby wipes often replace dust wipes, dust spray, paper towel, and makeup removers.
*From scratch cake is more like I scratched my head while deciding between the box cake mix or purchasing a premade cake.
*My sewing machine is a tube of no sew glue. In fact, my daughter’s curtains were made with a tube and a half.
*We have not used a clothes iron in years. Do not even know where it is? Instead we just hang up the items on hangers and let gravity do the work.
*Recipes are mere guidelines. I hate following directions.
The mental list goes on, but the soul cleansing has started. Just in case, a word to Martha – please do not stop by without calling ahead. The sink may be full, faces unwiped, toilet needing a scrub, numerous food crunchies underfoot, and me without my Super Hero Mama apron on.
Martha, I am not.